Archive for the ‘Food’ Category

Conflict of interest

December 31, 2007

I wanted an authentic Chicago hot dog, so I thought it would be a good idea to ask a local. I went into a 7-11, and bought a banana, just so I wouldn’t be completely wasting the guy’s time.

ME: “Where’s the best place to get a hot dog?”
7-11 GUY: (points to the hot dog warming case to his left)
ME: “Of course it is . . .”


Hello from the Windy City

December 29, 2007

It snowed pretty hard today for about 4 hours, but it was not too miserable outside. Spent most of the day in two hotels being interviewed by three universities. Things went well at two of them, and the third was a lesson in knowing thyself and in the interpretation of nonverbal communication.

Yesterday I ate breakfast at a fabulous place called Lou Mitchell’s. On the back of the menu it says, “Have a Lou Mitchell day!” What they mean is, “eat so much you will be feeling it all day long.” I obeyed, and didn’t eat again till about 7 p.m. I mean, they set the pace for you as you walk in the door, by handing you a donut hole with powdered sugar on it, from a wicker basket full of them. Can you say “GRUB”? For dinner, Italian Beef sandwich. Tonight for dinner, deep-dish cheese and sausage pizza.

Mountain Dew “Game Fuel”

October 8, 2007

By the way, I typed that last post on Halo after drinking my first can of the new Halo-themed Mountain Dew. It was pretty okay, but I don’t think I’ll buy another case of it. I want the original Pitch Black back!

Who says all Protestants ignore the Old Testament?

August 23, 2007

It’s not uncommon in my experience to find Protestants criticized for focusing more or less exclusively on the New Testament. But this article, entitled “Of Church and Steak,” (get it? we live in a theocracy headed by the ultra-pious George W. Bush, so it’s no wonder we can’t keep these things separate!), shows a “new breed” (ahem) of evangelical Christian: the kosher beef farmer. The North Dakota farmer profiled is named Scott Lively, and it’s all OT, all the time with him.

Mr. Lively adheres to a diet he believes Jesus followed. Like Mr. Wiesenfeld, he says the Bible prescribes that he use organic methods to respect the earth, treat his workers decently and treat the cattle that enter his slaughterhouse as humanely as possible.

“We learn everything from the Old Testament,” Mr. Lively said, “from keeping kosher to responsible capitalism.”

I reckon he means, “we learn everything about the cattle biz from the Old Testament,” since if he learned everything from it, he’d be Jewish instead of Christian. Even this, though, seems pushing it. This was the first I heard of capitalism in the ancient world, as well. Aside from loaves and fishes, and some wine, do we have any other record of Jesus’ diet? I can’t think of anything else, and beef is sounding kind of out of place, to my mind. Maybe I should check out The Maker’s Diet. (Or not.) Or listen a Joel Osteen sermon like “Living at your ideal weight.” (No longer available online, but it was last year. Who says that all Protestants pay attention to the Old OR New Testament?)

And if anybody has any idea where Lively gets the Biblical “prescription” to use organic methods, do tell!

Ganglion cyst chronicle, part 2; and Quik inquiry

August 7, 2007

I didn’t see the orthopedist today after all. He was called for jury duty. My new appointment is for next Tuesday, so I guess he wasn’t selected for the jury.

Has anyone bought any chocolate Nestlé Quik recently? Last time I bought it I got the “no sugar added” variety. I don’t remember if I just didn’t see the regular kind, or if, in a state of temporary insanity, I thought that adding no sugar was somehow a good thing. But this kind of Quik is rough and granular, whereas the strawberry Quik I have—which is NOT “no sugar added”—is fine and smooth. And tastes better.

The Nesquik website for parents (“”) says that all Nesquik is now with 25% less sugar. All I want to know is if all of it is now rough and granular.

Michael Moore’s “Sicko” undermines favorite Leftist myths

May 27, 2007

The Cannes Film Festival took place last week, with Michael Moore’s new film showing, out of competition, on May 19th. It’s called “Sicko” and in it, according to the Cannes site, “the filmmaker investigates the flaws in the American health care system.”

Looking cool in CannesHe does this, according to Anthony DePalma of the New York Times, by taking “a handful of sick Americans to Cuba for treatment in the course of the film”. Based on Cannes and the NY Times, you would think this movie is about medicine. But the fact that these “sick Americans” are actually World Trade Center first-responders, “heroes of 9/11”, as the LA Times puts it, shows the political motivation behind the film. (They are called “fist responders” on the front page of I suppose that means they swing first and ask questions later.) Says one of the men who was offered a trip to Cuba only to be “stiffed” by Moore:

“What he [Moore] wanted to do is shove it up George W’s rear end that 9/11 heroes had to go to a communist country to get adequate health care,” said McCormack, who suffers from chronic respiratory illness.


Random wound of the day

April 11, 2007

This morning I drew blood from the underside of my left middle finger, when I was using a butter knife to pry open a stubborn pistachio, and slipped. The little teeth on the knife left a furrow an inch and a quarter long, though blood only came out of the first half inch of it.

Moral: ALWAYS use a needle-nosed pliers to open the difficult pistachios.

The 6-foot nude chocolate Jesus

March 29, 2007

Are Christians supposed to derive spiritual benefit from seeing this sculpture, or are they supposed to be riled up by it? Or is the artist just trying to get publicity? (Note to irony-seekers: I know what I do in posting this.) The caption under the photo (“Jesus, The 485,460-Calorie Messiah”) seems to suggest an irreverent approach, at least by the Post Chronicle. It’s as if to say both that the Messiah is measurable by instruments, and that he is bad for you.

In favor of the sculpture:

  • Molding Christ in chocolate conveys the theme of eating Christ’s body. This is orthodox doctrine, though most Protestants deny that the Body of Christ is physically present in the Eucharist.
  • Rendering Christ naked on the Cross may be historically accurate. After all, the soldiers cast lots for his clothing.

Against the sculpture:

  • Molding Christ in chocolate conveys the theme of Christ as junk food, forbidden pleasure, thus thwarting whatever devotional impulse one might otherwise feel before a crucifix.
  • Molding Christ in chocolate implies that Christ is a seasonal delicacy, like the chocolate Easter bunny, to be consumed (or, paid attention to, or whatever) once a year.
  • This also positions Christ as a commodity.
  • Rendering Christ naked on the Cross may be historically accurate, but it may also cause impure thoughts in viewers. A minimally-clad Christ might also do this, but not so readily as one with exposed genitalia.

Molding things in chocolate imbues sculpted objects with a wholly other meaning than if they were formed from wood or some other non-food substance. There was an exhibit at a local gallery not so long ago that displayed chocolate tools. I’m not quite sure whether that meant to signify the trivialization of work and contempt for the proletariat or whether it was just dumb . . .

So Curly gives the chocolate Jesus a thumbs-down, even if the artist’s intent was pious. Which Curly, given his curmudgeonliness, doubts.

George Michael found slumped over in car, again

October 2, 2006

CNN article. The best part:

The singer’s partner, Kenny Goss, told The Sun that Michael had nothing to say. “He’s fine and I’ve got him a McDonald’s,” he said.

I hope by “a McDonald’s” he either meant a) ownership of a McDonald’s franchise, which would bring him some extra cash every year; or b) the Big Breakfast. Mickey D’s has good breakfast stuff, but most of the other menu items are likely to make a person feel worse than being slumped over in car, again.

MOL checking in for the weekend

June 2, 2006

What a day. Went grocery shopping in the morning, and saw Leonardo da Vinci on the cover of the Sun. This was about him, apparently—not something DVC related. The caption on his pic read “Famed prophet Leonardo da Vinci.” This reminded me of students I’ve had who describe the Bible as “the highly recognized book honored by the mainstream religion of the United States.” Lawda mersah.